Why are you so paranoid?

**Please note- some of my opinions about pregnancy are in here- and everyone should have the chance to do it their OWN WAY. thx.**

So one week later, one docs appointment later and no baby. Toni Braxton got me all riled up for nothing. NOTHING! It reminds me of the movie, He's Just Not That into You. I'm the rule. I'm going to deliver at 42 weeks. I'm not the exception who will deliver at 36. Waaah.

Ghostface is getting bigger, clocked at a guesstamate of 7.5 pounds, 140ish heart beats per minute and his/her moves are more and more like little alien moves under my skin. I'm allowed to exercise again because according to the birthing center, 36 weeks is full term and I can deliver at my leisure so I say giddy up! I'm going to have relations, while horse back riding (bareback, of course) in a down dog all while stimulating my nipples. What a mental image. And in this image I have flowing blonde hair with flowers laced throughout. Very trashy romantic novel cover-esque.

I'm not uncomfortable, I just want to get the party started already. Patience has never been a strong suit of mine- and after all of those talks from the midwives last week, I'm ready to go! Now I have that feeling that I talked about last week ALL THE TIME (the one I would get while stopping at the Wawa to get ciggies and hit the ATM before a BIG night out on the town that would more than likely end in disaster- and I mean that in a best way possible.) I'm pumped. As a result, I have elevated blood pressure and the M-wives aren't thrilled about it. Whatever- my adrenaline and oxytocin are getting my body prepped for the party.

I had a run in with some whoooo-oar employee at Trader Joe's who was trying to give me a 'Welcome to the Mom Club' speech but made me see once again why some women are down right terrified of becoming pregnant and giving birth- and it's at the hands of OTHER WOMEN!! She asked if I have nausea, discomfort and about all of the other "bad" things associated with pregnancy, to which I gave my normal response of, "No, it's been pretty good, actually, very boring and normal and easy!" To which the WHOOOOOO-OAR replied- "Well, delivery sure won't be that way" in a very glib sort of nature.

I smiled and walked away. I should've told her to poop in her fuckin' hat.

Actually, guess what, lady? I can't wait for it! And I think it's going to be GREAT! AND DID I MENTION THAT UNLESS I HAVE TO GO AND GET A C-SECTION BECAUSE MY OR MY BABY'S LIFE IS AT RISK THAT I'M DOING IT WITHOUT THE EPIDURAL- and guess what else- the place I'm having my kid doesn't EVEN OFFER DRUGS!!

I like to challenge myself- push myself to my limits. Did I tell you that I ran the Broad Street ten mile run last year on ZERO training- and RAN the whole way?! Have I mentioned that I do things sometimes when others say I can't just to prove them otherwise!? As far as I'm concerned, any physical feet is mostly mental and positive thoughts will CHANGE THE WORLD if we let them.

So here's my positive thought for the day: My amniotic sac is going to be filled with champange and my baby's first poop won't be meconium, it'll be that delicious canned squirt cheese that everyone secretly LOVEs. We'll buy some crackers pull up some flutes and all have a FUCKIN' FEAST!

Sheesh. **stepping down from my soap box.**

I planted an herb garden yesterday.

Basil, dill, chives, oregano and mint. 

More mint (mojito season, here I COME!) strawberries, parsley, lavender and catnip.

There's a hole in our patio. I bet a little critter is living in it. EEEK!

And I want a little dog to replace the hole in my heart left by Pickles. But I don't think this little portly dood will approve. (He's afraid of the wind.)

Sad Pickles' thought of the day: She would CHEW up every foam object in the house- had a particular place in her heart for old navy flippers. I was hurrying around the house cleaning all of the flippers up this weekend, getting Todd to hurry and get his together before the cats ruined them...then I remembered...it wasn't the CATS that ruined them...just one in particular. :-/ Oh, Pickles. Poor us, having to live life without her.Good for her for being able to run around and chase birds in the Big Litter Box in the sky.


gobblesmom said…
you sound ready to go! lots of luck the next few weeks - i know how much the waiting game sux!
Homevalley said…
I am with you on the labor tip... I am super-excited, and I think not finding out the sex adds a lot to that. I was just telling my cousin the other day that I choose to look at labor as a positive, empowering experience. Everyone else can suck it.
itskite said…
ugh- Why do people feel the need to invade your personal space and by that I mean simply open their mouths about anything. Good for you....Can you facebook email me your address- I have a gift still! and dont know when I will ever be back in PA!

Im gonna fedex it!

Also very interested in herb planting...let me know how it goes!
Katie said…
1- That whoo-oaarr sucks at life. I might be making the long trek to Trader Joe's this week, so I will let her know that myself! Hmpf.
2- What did I tell you about Mint?? Keep it away from other herbs unless you'll be drinking mojitos on a nightly basis. It literally grows like weeds. Make sure you keep an eye on it so it doesn't choke your other herbs.
3- Your pain threshold is way better than mine. I'd like to think I could go sans pain meds, but I highly doubt it. We'll see some day...