Thursday, May 28, 2009

Would you rather...

Not a lot of work to do today. Mostly because an intern is coming in tomorrow to help me do something that I've been putting off for most of the day. So now I'm left with not much to keep me busy and it's giving me a headache. Obviously...I went through my desk drawers for entertainment.

Would you rather...? is a book I picked up a few years ago when I needed to use the remainder of a Borders gift card. It poses questions of some hilarious, horrifying, gnarly, etc. choices. Example: 

Would you rather...

eat by putting food down your pants



Hilarious. Imagine the party tricks.  

Sometimes I wish that there was something really bizarre about me. EX: 

Would you rather...
have living eyebrows that crawl about your face


leave a trail of paprika where ever you go?

I want the former. I know first hand that people don't know how to act when others have physical features that aren't run of the mill...but this eyebrow thing seems sort of fun. Imagine sitting in a meeting and then there she goes! Your eyebrow creeps down the side of your face and hops on your upper lip to become...a mustache. The mustache part isn't as creepy looking as the no-eyebrow look. 

See? Mustaches are normal(ish) in comparison.

Tonight Todd and I are heading out to get him a shirt and tie for Kelly's wedding. I'm going to wear my infinite dress to so I'm pretty much set but this eyebrow thing gets me thinking. I think I might switch designs throughout the night and pretend like there's nothing going on; I have infinite choices, right? infinite dress is black...and I think I might take a run to the fabric store so I can try to make a new one. Teal I thinks. That's a good summer color. 

This is risky business, of course, since I've only made three things with my sewing machine. 

1. I made a sweatshirt- but forgot that shirts are things (as are most articles of clothing) that are what the fashion design industry refers to as symmetrical. It's a fairly easy feat to accomplish when sewing since all you have to do is fold the thing in half and make one cut to produce the two sides. I didn't do it that way. I eye-balled it...and came up with a shoulder that's a great deal tighter than the other. Nothing sweet like this instead it was sort of a mess. 

2. I made a snuggie/slanket for Danielle for graduation. Easy enough...except I still wasn't following the sewer's/carpenter's creed, "measure twice, cut once" at all. 

3. I get weird neck/shoulder blade cramps so I took and old pillow case and stuffed it with THREE bags of polyester stuffing. Guess what that's like? Sleeping on a rock. 

Most likely, I'll be wearing the black infinite dress. Either way, it might be fun to try out this traveling eyebrow dress business.  

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Kelly's Bach- really late too. She was a serious trooper. 
This was at something like 3am---->

I used to be a master photo uploader. In the summer of 2005 I was pretty depressed so I decided to take my $100 camera from target and head down to center city to become
 reacquainted with the city where I grew up.  (myspace blog link if you can see it: Myspace

I figured since I put that camera to good use I deserved to 'treat' myself with a new,  wicked awesome camera- 8 mega pixels, 7x zoom- it was awesome and compact! My friends and I would go out at night, pose all over joints in center city (think umbrellas open inside bars and sunglasses at night- we love props) and then race home to get them up on Myspace- no matter what time it was at night. In retrospect, the whole 'racing home' part was pretty dangerous.

In the fall of 2006 I started back at Neumann and mistakenly left my camera in my bag on one of my away games...and it went missing. I was really pissed about it (mostly b/c I had just paid it off and I HATE thieves) so I pretty much lost my interest in the chore of taking pictures and certainly wasn't a fan of spending countless buzzed hours in front of my desktop at 3am posting the night's activities. Furthermore, I think we covered most of the shots we needed (I hadn't
bought new sunglasses in MONTHS and Rick was on hiatus.)  Recently, I bought a new camera and it works pretty well. In fact, as far as  cameras are concerned it's a pretty sweet point-and-shoot and certainly rivals the camera I had when my crew and I painted the town red in 05-06.   


I was just looking through my camera and came across these gems from the past three months or so. Also, Shannon's voice popped into my head last night- she was talking about blogging- people LOVE pictures. So...contained are some recents. 

<--Kelly, Tursi and me. We look like we're having a blast. Funny, that's one of my camera tricks. (With camera in my left hand) "OK, guys, get it together, here we go, look like you're having a blast!" CLICK. Voila.

<---me and my loooooffer.

Loooffer and Party Robot------->

I STINK at putting pictures in blogger. WAY more difficult than Myspace was. 

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Ten (NEW) uses for an (OLD) cereal box

I used to be an eighth grade English teacher. I got rid of many of my teaching supplies with the exception of some poetry books, novels, my portfolio and a few teaching tools I used that I used to teach writing and grammar.  I was rooting through my desk (which I often do when I'm at a loss of activities at work) and came across Creative Thinking Journal Topics for grades 4-8

A few comments before I jump in- 

When editors go through school guides- what makes them group certain grade together? As previously mentioned, I used to teach 8th grade, and in my experience, found them to be barely tolerable until near the end of the school year when they were whisked away to high school (and fortunately, to another building far, far away from me.) Furthermore, I've found 7th graders to be some of the most obnoxious people on the planet. How on earth, then, could 4th graders be grouped with either of these sets of people? A great deal happens between those years for boys and girls alike and I can only imagine what my former students would've said had I posted this question on the board. 

Ten (NEW) uses for an (OLD) cereal box:

1. Most obvious: a mask. Have you seen the movie Bag Head? If not- see it- Todd gave it a hundred Netflix stars. Plot line: people go to woods to try and write a movie. One half of the crew create a plan to scare the other half by wearing a bag on their heads. Hilarity ensues. 

2. Build a secret file cabinet. I used to have one of those secret stash shaving cream jars. It didn't turn to be much a of secret as I'm fairly certain my saved cash funded a few of my siblings' adolescent adventures. Downside: it's not fire (nor sibling) proof. 

3. Cat toy. My cats LOVE to take running leaps into boxes. One of the three is fairly portly and I think it might be pretty amusing to watch him wrestle with the Captn'Crunch box. 

4. Make my own Shoes Under (Wiki it) or at least one for Todd.

5. Make giant box-gloves to make noise when people take free throws at basketball games.

6. Send nautical signals from boats.

7. Make-shift guitar. Stretch rubber bands over a home-made cut out and wail away.

8. Bulk food storage spot. I think about things like this from time to time. We buy cat food in HUGE bags b/c our cats like snacks- but it's sort of a pain to store. Perhaps putting some in Ziploc bags then inside the cereal boxes might help. 

9. Fill 'em with sand and use them as deco art book ends. (I'm really struggling here...)

10. Use them as pillows for guests to make the feel more welcome. 

OR...throw them the eff out like a normal person. 

I'm all about using materials over for off-label use but really- who wants to have a bunch of cereal boxes laying around? 

Remember that part in Forgetting Sarah Marshall where Peter is recalling reasons why he loves Sarah? Getting him more organized with a Tupperware cereal container was one of those memories. I do the same thing- as soon as I open the box, I dump the contents in a plastic tub and the remaining material hits the recycle container immediately. We have little rodents who rear their ugly mugs from time to time so I need something a little stronger than cardboard and a chip clip to keep them away. 

Monday, May 18, 2009

Burning down the house.

List the items you'd save from your house if it were on fire:

The cats
Stack of papers in the kitchen closet (wedding license, really- the other stuff can be printed from el Internet-o.)
Photo albums made by Grandma
Wedding album and CDs with the proofs
My sewing machine
Sears Craftsmad bottle opener Joe got us for Christmas
A fistfull of under garments- hopefully my favorites are clean
My Rainbow flippers
One of my laptops-probably the Mac. Hopefully the day before the house catches on fire, I will have left my work laptop in the car.
White jeans (the ones without the stain-in my haste of saving each of these things, I hope I grab the right ones)

To be honest, that's about it. I feel like a slug today after spending the daylight hours of the past two days in and out of sleep in bed and/or on the that's probably why saving many of my material possessions accumulated over the years aren't on the top of my list. I'm sure that I'm missing some things that I take for granted...but today, I wouldn't mind starting over. 

Note to reader: I'm not a sewing maniac nor am I that good at it per se, but, I just learned how to use it and I regard sewing as one of the few hobbies I partake in that I'm sort of proud of. I can make things so I think I'd be mad if I didn't have the machine and I'm not certain that I'd buy another one if this one were destroyed in a fire. 

While I'm at it, I have a load of crap in my car that I might want to perish in the flames so we really can start over...I'm not sure how funny a chicken suit is anymore and all of those old sneakers? 


Thursday, May 14, 2009


I don't like running. I like to be able to say that I've ran ____ amount of miles...but I don't like to run. I suppose it's the same with a lot of things for me- I like the product, but not the process-with running as the exception, of course (In an attempt to get in shape for my wedding, I was running a half hour a day. You know what it helped me do? Get a lot of reading in- not get rid of the little triangle of arm fat women seem to accumulate between their upper arm and breasts. Later I read that in order to really make a difference with your body, you have to run something like 45 miles a week. No thanks. I could barely lift my legs for a half hour on a treadmill in an air conditioned room.)

I feel bad about this whole hate/hate relationship I have with running. My husband started running a few months ago and he's really getting into the process and the mechanics of it all. I ran the Broad Street run this year to be able to say that I did it and I tried to go out for some runs this and last week but it just reinforced my original thought: I hate runnning. We'll just have to stick to our other common interests and that's fine with me. He can have it.

Yesterday Isrut asked mentioned that I should blog b/c she thinks that I'd have some funny/quirky things to say. I tried before...and wasn't impressed with myself and deleted them all. I suppose I'll give it a try but I'm going to use a crutch (remember the product/process statement?) My sister bought Todd a book for Christmas: Listography. He can have running, I'm stealing his book. Here goes.

List places you've lived. (yawn)

3600 Huey-Born there and grew up.
 1. Lauren and I used to fight which side was ours in our bedroom. 
2. Helping Lauren counti the slats in the fence in the driveway when she borrowed Madge's car while she was away incase she counted which slat the car was parked by. 
2. Realizing that people could see in the window when it was dark out when I had the lights on while throwing a party with mom out of pulled up...neat.

341 Upland. 
1. Jackie reminded me that there was a secret passage way that went from our room to dad and Grace's room. Pretty awesome. 

519 Windemere. 
1.  Peeker neighbors. 
2. Finding out that grapefruit juice is a decent beverage.

759-7 Naamans Rd.
1. Stolen car with 200+ CDs in the front seat. It 'turned up' nine months later.
2. Daily four mile walks in the morning up and down Naamans Rd.
3. First apartment.

541 Chester Pike
1. People walking in still thinking it was a dentists office. I suppose it was our fault for leaving the door unlocked.
2. Biggest closet I had to my self in my entire life.
3. Living with three other chicks and a dude. 
4. Nailing down the art of passive aggressive house cleaning.
5. Bud/Nascar/ebay phase. 

300 W. Jefferson
1. Shacked up.
2. Got kitties.
3. Got engaged.
4. Our neighbor Sylvia

811 Aston Mills
1. First mortgage.

I could get all nostalic about these places being the scenery of the history of my life...but instead I'll play wall ball at work.